Are you a supercommunicator?
Have you ever been going through something and just wanted to be heard? When you finally find that friend, colleague, executive coach, therapist who truly hears you, you feel such a weight lifted off your shoulders. Through both their presence and questions, they lift you up and make you feel understood. On the other hand, are you the person who others come to when they are facing issues or challenges? Do you embrace the conversation asking questions so you can understand their truth and help them process? It turns out, there is a name for people who are powerful at creating authentic connections through listening and talking.
They are called:
Supercommunicators
On February 20, Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit, published a new book called, ‘Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection. ‘On February 29, he did an interview with NPR where he talked about the 4 habits of highly effective communicators. In his interviews he defined supercommunicators as “people who are consistently able to create authentic connections with others just by listening and talking.”
Through scientific research, psychology and interviews with people who rely on communication (including both spies and executives) he was able to define four habits of super communicators:
They know what kind of conversation they are having
They prove they are listening
They ask the right questions (and a lot of them, in fact 10-20 times as many questions as everyone else)
They aim to understand
If you have 22 minutes, you may want to listen to the interview which dives deeper into this topic.
In my time as an executive coach, the topic of situational communication comes up often when we talk about executive presence. Situational communication is adapting your style of communication to reflect the audience with whom you are speaking. It involves strong situational awareness, knowledge of your audience, and deep self awareness to know how you are showing up.
The great news for all of us, Charles Dihigg’s research showed that no specific personality is more prone than others to be a supercommunicator. In fact, it is just a set of skills that we all can learn.
